Dealing with a bad break-up is never easy, but breaking off an engagement is a whole other level of hurt. If wedding planning has already begun, questions of who will inform the guests and deal with canceling all the events is a sticky situation. But another more confusing question of whether or not to return your engagement ring has plagued many scorned brides-to-be.
ABC News reports about Mariah Carey’s recent split where she and Australian billionaire James Packer called off their engagement. As many may have guessed, the pop diva states very candidly that she has no plans to return her giant 35 carat rock to Packer even though their walk down the aisle will never be.
Keeping a beautiful sparkly expensive ring may be tempting to many, but is it proper etiquette to hold on to the bling after the engagement is no more? Marriage Proposal Planner, Engagement Expert and Huffington Post contributor Michele Velazquez discusses the ins and outs of what to do with the ring after your fiance is out the door.
According to Velazquez, the keeper of the ring must consider a few things before making the decision of whether to give it back or not. The question of who called off the engagement and for what reason are things to think about. If he just isn’t ready to get married yet and you gave up a career to move half-way across the country to live with him in wedded bliss, Velazquez advises that you may have more of a right to hang on to your rock.
But if you are the guilty party due to cheating or lying, returning the ring makes more sense. Velazquez says, “He gave you a commitment and a promise with that ring and you obviously didn’t take that very seriously. Same goes if the roles are reversed.”
Another consideration when making this decision is whether or not the ring is a family heirloom. Keeping your ex-fiance’s great grandmother's engagement ring just doesn’t seem like a very nice thing to do no matter the circumstance.
What do you think of Mariah Carey keeping her engagement ring even though the wedding is off?
Do you think it’s ever okay to keep the ring after a break-up?
I am not sure of why the break up. Maybe he looked at her kids the wrong way. Who knows. As far as giving the ring back...I can't say if I would or would not have. I am not a fan of Mariah Carey. I don't know her so I can't speak on her character negatively or positively and what she should have ethically done. Only she and he knows the real story.
I think you should always give the ring back. Not necessarily because its the right thing to do; because it gives you that sense of actually being finished with the whole thing. It will no longer be your problem and you will no longer have that reminder of what could have been. That may just be a me thing because I recently got dumped (not like we were engaged but whatever) by someone very important to me and I didn't get the chance to return the ring he gave me so I always have that reminder of what didn't end up a happily ever after. I wish every day that I had just gone to his house and put the ring in his hand and walked away as one final screw you, you big jerk. On the bright side though, he is out two sweatshirts, three t-shirts a pair of shorts and a PS4 because he was too much of a coward to 1) even tell me "its not working out" and 2) to show his face and get his stuff back from me.
I think it really depends. However the engagement ring is a gift and the wearer should have the right to keep it. If they cheated, caused or wanted the breakup, then I think they should return it. Some have gone to court over this and the judges ruled it was a gift & the wearer was awarded to keep it.
Mariah Carey is a diva in the worst way. I'm not surprised at all that she would keep the ring. Considering her ex-fiancé is a billionaire, he's probably coming out ahead when you consider what a divorce would have cost him. Cut your losses and RUN James!
1) i can look at this in a couple different ways...if i was poor which I am id keep the ring. 2) she's rich and called if off probably wouldn't be cool to keep, give it back but then he's rich so i'd donate it to a good charity! lifesatrip
I believe it depends on the situation as you have stated above. If he called off the engagement for some reason then yes I do agree the woman should be able to keep the ring. However if the woman is the guilty party then she should give it back. Engagements aren't just something you should do because you feel like it. If a man is committed and asks a woman to marry him but then decides oh I'm not ready it's not the woman's fault you gave her the ring. On another hand if she cheats or says she's not happy and leaves then yes give the ring back.