Yes, yes, we can agree that the holidays are a magical time of year. But can we not also agree that when grandchildren are screaming, sons-in-law are talking politics, and daughters-in-law are recruiting dishwashers, we could all use a place to hide for a little while? Here are eight possible getaways. 1. The gym. It’s the last place anyone would look for you. Grab that free guest pass that’s been hanging on the fridge for months, the one that sits next to your weight chart from 2003. Note: You don’t have to actually work out; most gyms now have flat-screen TVs and smoothie bars.
2. The movies. After days on end watching High School Musical, WALL*E, and that little Spanish-speaking girl who’s always checking her map, escape the grandchildren’s B-movies for something R-rated!
3. The road. Clear that dangerously catchy children’s music from your head by blasting The Beach Boys greatest hits as you hit the highway. If you come home with Happy Meals, the kids won’t question why you disappeared for two hours.
4. The lotus position. If anyone questions why you’re taking a nap in a seated position, tell them that Dr. Oz from Oprah says that people who meditate live longer than those who don’t, and ask, "You want Grandma to live longer, don’t you?" 5. The café. Or any other place where you can read a book without someone crawling on your lap and asking, "Why aren’t there any pictures?" 6. The kids’ bedroom. Seeking solitude? If you go in the kids’ room and tell them that it’s time to clean it up, they’ll be sure to run off and stay far, far away.
7. The yard, the roof, the shed, or the garden. If you pick up a hoe and look like you know what you’re doing, no one will stop you. 8. The bathroom. Once you reach our age, you can stay in the bathroom for up to 30 minutes, and no one will think twice.