Early Twenties Too Young To Say 'I Do'?

SS Member Image By drodriguez 09.30.11
Early Twenties Too Young To Say 'I Do'?

A recent SheSpeaks poll reveals that almost 60% of our members think that between the ages of 25 and 29 is the perfect time for nuptials. Only about 11% feel 18 to 24 year olds should be planning a wedding and there may be a good reason for this.

Though there is no magic number for when you should tie the knot, research does show that your marriage has a better chance of surviving if you wait to make that commitment until you are in your mid-twenties or later. The fact that many women have already been through college by the time they turn 25 could have something to do with marriage success.

A Cosmopolitan magazine report points out some research that reveals women with more education usually have more lasting relationships than women who have received less schooling. Terri Orbuch, PhD, author of Five Simple Steps to Take Your Marriage From Good to Great, reveals why women who already have college degrees fare better in marriages. Orbuch says, “Educated women tend to be more confident about who they are and less willing to settle for a man who doesn’t meet their standards”

Just the fact that we are a little older and wiser once we reach our mid-twenties probably has a lot to do with a lasting marriage too. By the time most women reach 25 they know who they are and have enough dating experience to know who would make the best long term partner.

What age do you think is the right time to get married?

Why do you think people who marry at 25 or older have a better chance of staying together?


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  • loves2read13 By loves2read13

    My husband was 21 and I was 20 when we got married and we've been married for 27 years so I think what it all comes down to is are you really ready to make a commitment or not. I had a friend who I worked with and she and her husband married right out of high school and are still married to this day. I have seen some friends who get divorced after 3 years and some who are still married. Married early or married later in life, it just depends on how you both handle all the stresses in life and what your maturity level is no matter what your age is.

  • heatherv112506 By heatherv112506

    My parents married young. My mom was 18 and my dad was 17. They have been happily married for 26 years now. I married young as well. I was 20 and my husband was 22. We have been married for 5 years in November and have three beautiful little girls. Marriage is something that you should do when you are personally ready, not when someone suggests an age.

  • alecsys1999 By alecsys1999

    I understand there are so many people out there that have married their high school sweethearts and that is amazing if you are still married. The problem is that things have changed through the years and kids are marrying for all the wrong reasons. Hence why divorce rates are so high through the past few years. I married my high school sweetheart we have a beautiful 12yr daughter from our relationship and we have been divorced for 11 years. People think OMG I have to get married now, what I don't understand is if you want to get married at 18, what will change if you wait til after college and you are in your mid to late 20's? If it is truly and honestly meant to be it will happen no matter what age you are so there is no reason to rush into a marriage. I have been happily married now for 7 years to someone I have known my whole entire life! I regret my divorce because I was not raised that way. But I also was not raised to take beatings and abuse.

  • MKB1970 By MKB1970

    I believe while in your early 20's, you are trying to find yourself. You are no longer living under your parents' expectations and are spreading your wings to fly into adulthood. This phase in your life should be a time to explore yourself. Find out who you are and the kind of person you could see yourself settling down with, not taking the time to figure these things out only leads to regrets later in life. We change so much in a decade's time so, what we decide in the early parts of that time span can greatly differ from what we feel towards the end. I believe by the time a person hits the early to mid 30's they will know what they want more than someone in their early 20's. If you find love in your 20's, give it time to grow and mature before settling down.... after all, true love stands the test of time.

  • PickieChicky By PickieChicky

    I think that women are usually more nature than men in their early twenties and late teens. I know that I was. I have never been married but was in a long term relationship of almost 12 years. My Ex's immaturity definitey created huge issues. I'd definitely have to say this is too young but there are always exceptions to the rule.

  • frugalkelly By frugalkelly

    I am still married to the same man I married when I was 18. That was almost 11 years ago.

  • Jensimp_ly By Jensimp_ly

    I got married at 22 and have been happily married for six years. I think the key to our marriage working though is that my husband is eight years older than me. He was finished with all his partying days and was ready to settle down. I think the age makes a difference more with the men.

  • lisastovall73 By lisastovall73

    I got married at 20. He is 13 years older. Although we've had our share of problems, we've stayed together for almost 18 years. We've had three children, the first one is the reason we got married. I don't recommend this for anyone, but it gas worked for us.

  • csr1223 By csr1223

    I got married right out of high school. I am still happily married and have four great children. When you are ready to get married and have found the right person you want to spend forever with then you will know for sure. I think that being in your late twenties people are probably more financially stable and have maybe accomplished a lot of their career goals as well as other goals in their life.

  • CBSmith By CBSmith

    Most young women I know, they go to college, get their 4 yr degree, then they think its time to get married. Some are more mature than others. Some have no idea of what it means to have a budget, run a household, etc. Personally I got married at 23 (he was 28), had my sons at 24 and 25. We will be celebrating our 17th anniversary soon.

  • jannadavis By jannadavis

    Honestly, I feel as though this can swing both ways. I could make arguments for both sides. I think it depends on your values, maturity, and the type of relationship you have with the other person. I don't think that anyone could paint all early marriages with a broad brush and say "Its not a good idea," I would say they are delusional if they tried. I think that if one thinks that they are ready for marriage, and do everything they can to prepare themselves for that commitment, then by all means, go ahead. But if you have any sort of doubt or hesitation, might as well wait, you have plenty of time to spare.

  • blondemonstersmommy By blondemonstersmommy

    I was ready for marriage at 22. My ex-husband, at 27, wasn't. I have an 18 year old bf who is very mature beyond his years, and we both feel like he could handle such a big thing as marriage. I believe it's all about the person you are in a relationship with.

  • pharmgirl101 By pharmgirl101

    I don't think so at all! I was 21 when I got married and ive never been happier! People are mature enough at different ages. There is no set age when your old enough.

  • njhousewife247 By njhousewife247

    For some this may be true... but for me, it's so far from the truth! My (quick) story: 1999-ish I dropped out of high school. Fast forward a couple years to August 2003 when I met Marvin. May 2004 our son was born. August 2004 he proposed. November 2004 there we were at City Hall exchanging our vows (he was 21... I was 19). Almost 7 years later and we're still happily married! We are just as much in love, if not more, and couldn't imagine our lives without each other. I know quiet a few couples who graduated college, got married after 25 and are now divorced after a few years (if that). It doesn't matter how educated you are or your age, whether it be 19 or 29! If you're mature enough, you know when it's right and make things work because you love each other.

  • Preppygirlsc By Preppygirlsc

    Here's the thing, I was fairly mature even in my early 20's, but if you could put all that I THOUGHT I knew in to a thimble it wouldn't be half full. There is so much growing to do before you are 25. Things that you think, change rapidly with experience and in this day and age of so many experiences to have & to share that waiting until 25 on is best for all parties :)

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